Clawed presents... the best list of all time!
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http://www.spin.com/articles/spins-100-greatest-guitarists-all-time
In the spirit of this momumental list, I also present to you a list by yours truly:
Claude's 10 Greatest Pianist of All Time
10) Skrillex - Look, as far as I know, our asymmetrically coiffed party pal has never sat at a piano in his life. But no contemporary musician has a more primal understanding of adrenaline-pumping, pulse-raising, chest-caving bulldozer chordss than dubstep mosh ambassador Skrillex. Somewhere between the unfiltered piston-pumps of neo-classical and the twinkling minimalist melodies that weaned him is a gaping sarlacc of yawping melodies and buzzsaw edges. The bass drop to "Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites" might just be this generation's "Smoke on the Water" — look no further than the obscene number of "Skrillex piano cover" videos on YouTube!
9) Maria Anna Walburga Ignatia Mozart - A highly acclaimed harpsichordist and fortepianist in her childhood. If woman did anything besides make and raise children in the 1700's she would have out-Mozarted Mozart. Oh wait... you thought I was going to include Mozart in this list? Well fuck you!
8) Ralf Hütter (Kraftwerk) - He's so good you can't even tell when he's playing the calculator or the keyboard!
7) Lady Gaga - She can play piano with her feet!
6) Joanna Newsom - We speak in the store, I'm a sensitive bore. You seem markedly more, and I'm oozing surprise. But it's late in the day, and you're well on your way. What was golden went gray, and I'm suddenly shy. And the gatherin' floozies; afford to be choosy. And all sneezing darkly, in the dimming divide. And I have read the right books to interpret your looks. You were knocking me down with the palm of your eye!
5) Christopher Bear (Grizzly Bear) - He wrote the piano part for "Two Weeks"... I think? He played it live on Letterman, so hell, 5th greatest piano player ever.
4) Claire Boucher (Grimes) - She can sing AND play the keyboard at the same time! Shit!
3) Kristín Anna Valtýsdóttir (Kría Brekkan) - I like Animal Collective, and the album Feels contains her piano playing, therefore, Kristín.
2) Geir Jenssen (Biosphere) - Although he doesn't technically play the piano, it's what he's did to the sound of piano pieces in his iconic remix album Shenzhou.
1) Claude Debussy - You all knew it was coming. Right?
Greatest Moment - When he performed his brilliant piano composition "Claire De Lune" to wild applause from the Ethiopian audience. -
I do agree with some of these? But I definetly feel as if the piano on feels was everything no matter who played it, the vibes I get from that piano are amazing. Also the Piano on STGSTV is pretty awesome.
I don't know many pianist so I can't really start a rebuttal or counterargument. -
Screw Beethoven! Skrillex! RAARRRGH
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i disagree and once my brain works again i will be posting a counter piano list so duck and cover yawl! i just brought a shotgun to a daycare and the safety is on!
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Oh god...
I really hope you guys didn't think I was serious. Maybe it's because I'm not very sarcastic on the forum, this is probably the most sarcastic I've been so far.
Just to make things VERY clear, clear as crystal, I hated the SPIN list I posted the link for, and my list is no where near to my actual opinion. Truth be told, I don't have the balls to actually claim I know the greatest pianists in the world. And although I love a lot of the artists I put on my list (fuck Skrillex), I was merely trying to satirize the subjectivity that SPIN used to make their choices for the 100 greatest "guitarists."
For those of you who didn't read the list, here's a few highlights with my commentary:
100 SKRILLEX - (Doesn't play guitar, makes brostep)
10 Jam Master Jay (Run-DMC) - (Doesn't play guitar either, makes hip-hop)
1 Lee Ranaldo & Thurston Moore (Sonic Youth) - (clang, clang, clang - I feel bad picking on then because I like Sonic Youth but, number 1 guitarists in the world? Really?)
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I forgot to add, you know how they claim Skrillex to be the 100th best guitarist of all-time? You want to know where Jimi Hendrix was? NOWHERE, they didn't include him on the list!
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Thanks Doc, always good to make sure. Skrillex for president!
Ziggy - Totally agree with you about the list. I mean, I respect that they choose to make a list not aligning to the stereotypical choices, but they totally threw some of those choices out the window. Their parameter was that it was guitarists that added to the sound of the guitar, or something like that. Jimi Hendrix played like no one else played, with sounds no one else created! Not to mention all the great melodies he wrote. -
debussy is a pussy, mozart is my home boiiiiii.
best guitarist ever
#1- Little young money wayne
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